My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:15,16

Then Jesus said, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?"
John 11:40
See, I have written your name on the palms of my hands… Isaiah 49:16a

Friday, January 28, 2011

Trust...Pt 4

Part 4.....

I started praying asking God to help me just get upstairs. I now was starting to doubt the wisdom of my choice to leave the hospital.  I made it to the upstairs washroom and my pants were again partially soaked in blood. I had clots coming out that were almost as large as a baseball. In the hospital they had told me to keep any clots that were coming out so they could monitor them and so I grabbed a bucket from under the sink and gave up sitting on the toilet and held the bucket under me. I didn't know what to do anymore. I tried to put on a new pad thinking if I could just get laying down, this would stop. It was soaked in moments. I changed it, again the same thing. At this point the washroom was starting to look like a crime scene. The bucket was now about 1/4 full. I held it under me and started calling for my mom. No response. I looked down and the blood was now a constant small stream. I called again, nothing. I got out a towel and held it under me and tried to walk. My legs were so shaky, I couldn't let go of the cupboard.  My ears were ringing very loudly by this point and my eyes were getting black spots in them. I screamed for my mom, praying that God would make her hear me. I remember praying "Jesus I don't want to die, help me!!!" My mom came running up the stairs as the room was spinning around me and my knees were buckling. She held me up and helped me to my room and put me on the bed, towels packed against me to soak up the blood. They called an ambulance and the first responders showed up. Now that I was laying down, the bleeding had slowed somewhat and my head was not ringing so much. The first responders were so nice. They talked to me and kept me calm while we waited for the ambulance to drive from Regina. (They got to the farm in about 25 minutes, it usually takes about an hour)
The storm was growing.....
They loaded me in the ambulance and started off to Regina with Greg hot on their heels in our car. The paramedic in the back with me, Kurt,  was trying to start an IV.  My veins were not cooperating and the road was so bumpy. They pulled the ambulance over to the side of the road about a 1/4 mile from the farm. I heard the driver say, "I think I better go talk to your husband, he looks really worried." Greg had hopped out of the car and was running to the ambulance, he thought something was wrong. The driver assured him I was okay and we would be on the road soon. Kurt was wonderful and I hardly felt the needle at all. The IV was in in moments and we continued on our way. The driver and Kurt were in communication with the Dr. at the hospital the whole way in. They updated him as we drove on what had happened and what they had done so far. The Dr. said that because of the amount of blood lost already, he wanted a second IV started so we pulled over again. The wonderful driver hopped out quickly so Greg wouldn't worry! We drove fast on the way to Regina, but once we hit the city  it felt like we were driving a whole lot faster! They put on the lights and sirens and we flew. The driver chuckled at one point and said, "Man, your husband is a little crazy! He is keeping up with us no problem."  Because of the sudden change with the lights, sirens and pace of driving in the city, he thought that I had died. I felt bad for him once we got to the hospital and he told me that. He was so worried. At times I almost felt that I didn't need to be concerned anymore with living through this hemorrhaging, through the ambulance ride!
We pulled into the ambulance bay at the hospital and the first face I saw was my dad's who was waiting there for me. did my heart good and was a comfort to see his face. (I guess being an almost retired paramedic gets you certain privileges in certain restricted areas ;o) )
They wheeled me into the ER and what Dr. walks in the room????? Dr. A. THANK YOU GOD!!!
I had an immediate sense of the peace of God as he walked in.  He brought such an air of peace into the room, fear had no place there. Greg and my dad followed us into the room and stood to the side as they worked on me. They hung IV bags on the poles and were injecting me with things trying to slow the bleeding and get it under control...I still had a lot of pressure off and on and each time, more large clots would come with another rush of blood....this was not going well.  They called for 6 units of blood to be on hand. They checked my hemoglobin and it was down to 69. (which meant not much to me at the time, I had no idea! Later on it meant a huge, constant headache and dizziness with light headed feeling) I did NOT want a blood transfusion, I prayed God please help me again!!! My Dr. came in to talk to me about the transfusion and said if the bleeding did not slow down very soon I would have to have one whether I wanted it or not. Normally he would give the blood if a person's hemoglobin was around 75.
To be continued.....

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